The world is imploding because millennials no longer spend money on extravagant dates at upscale restaurants, mansions, or motorcycles.

Due to an unsettling increase in social consciousness and financial understanding among today’s young adults, hardworking CEOs of several big businesses are now experiencing severe losses after decades of comfortable income. Millennials’ blatant frugalness is directly linked to the gradual demise of important sectors like golf, napkins, and Buffalo Wild Wings, according to a startling flurry of Business Insider investigations. Presently, they even reject credit cards. They must be unaware that debt is a reality of life.

All these morally bankrupt hipsters can do is whine about “local companies” and “living wages” as society as we know it disintegrates beneath our feet. Why are they unable to just behave like excellent little consumers did as children? There is nothing left for the businesses that these savages are ruthlessly demolishing to do but feverishly advertise the goods that they have always sold and hold out hope that the millennials will soon return to the light.

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Credits: bananalanguage.com

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